This image was taken as part of a self led project exploring femininity after adversity. This lady struggles with anxiety and low self esteem, and although she is very beautiful she has no sense of herself in that way. I wanted to depict the feeling of being fragmented, pulled by the mind in different directions and not feeling confident or comfortable in any of them. 

There is a sense of starting to believe that she is beautiful, worthwhile and confident as the hint of a smile is starting to emerge even as she feels battered, bruised and unsure of how this will unfold. 

Femininity and Lack of Self Worth

I created this image after a particularly deep meditation session. I am Vipassana trained and love to contemplate life and the deeper meaning of life. I felt that this captured a sense of stillness and insight and was expressive of the moment. 

Contemplation

This self portrait was born out of isolation in 2020. It represents change and how things felt like they had been thrown in the air and I was waiting for them to settle again. There is a sense of hope and joy in this image as the colours are indicative of a brighter future and new way of being. 

I faced big changes through lockdown and lost a 20 year business, however it gave me time to focus more on my passion for creativity. It opened the door to me being able to spend more time doing what I love and honing my craft. 
 
I faced a lot of uncertainty and unknowns hence the white space at the top allowing for new things and opportunities to come to me and create the next chapter. 

Abstract Self Portrait

This image was inspired by the song Hide And Seek by Howard Jones. I incorporated it as a self portrait as the song really touched me in lots of ways. I wanted to show the separation we can feel from life and others, while we are all connected it is hard to remember that sometimes.

There is a line in the song that says :

Then as part of the game
She completely forgot where she'd hidden herself
And she spent the rest of her time
Trying to find the parts

I feel like that sometimes and this represents me trying to find the parts of myself that I've hidden.

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Cat Hamilton